January 4, 2001: I Hate "Cool" Politics

You crazy kids and your hip, nutty political beliefs. It seems like just about every high school / college kid who fancies themselves as some sort of rebel follows at least one or all of a standard set of political beliefs that I guess sounds good if you're trying to scare your parents, but doesn't hold much water otherwise. I'm not a person who views things as how they should be or how I'd like them to be; I view things as they are, and as things are, most "cool" politics is utter bullshit.

Anarchy - Most "politically active" types just see anarchy as something cool to write on their sociology notebooks, but believe it or not, some people actually think it's a good idea. And it doesn't take a genius to figure out that anarchy is an idea so dumb, it makes the new formula for Coke or The Gobbeldy Gooker seem like pure genius by comparison. You see a world where people live in harmony with no rules or people telling them what to do, and in this fantasy world, I wouldn't be surprised if there were also friendly, magical dragons and little blue people who live in mushrooms. Anarchy would result in total, well.... anarchy. It would result in a society where chaos reigns, starving people fight with dogs for food, and people are killed indiscriminately for whatever gasoline or ammunition they possess. The class system you seek to eliminate would be in a much worse, "only the strong survive" mode, and Master Blaster and Tina Turner will rule Bartertown with an iron fist. Simply put, anarchy is dumb, you gimp.

"Fuck the police!" - Let's face it - There are a lot of bad cops out there. There are brutal cops, cops in on the drug trade, and cops who kick you off your super cool skateboards. But you have to understand, for every bad cop that makes headlines or pisses you off, there are a hundred, maybe a thousand, good ones. Cops are a necessary part of our society. Without them, crime would be even worse than it is, and it would be a lot like the Mad Max scenario I pointed out in the above rant. And if cops are so damn bad, when someone steals your shit, attacks you, or does anything else to cause harm to you in an illegal manner, who do you call? You go straight to those nasty police. So the next time someone steals your car or something like that, just be quiet about it, and be happy with your little social protest, while your ass WALKS to work... And for the record, I have the strangest feeling that if under the same circumstances, Leonard Peltier or Mumia Abu Jamal had been convicted of killing convenience store clerks or peace punks instead of cops, you fucking "activists" would be begging to throw the switch yourselves.

Communism - This idea is a little different, as it actually does sound good on paper. On paper. It really would be nice to live in a world where everyone was equal and did their fair share of the work. But let's face it, this is an idealist's movement, that would require an almost perfect world to succeed in, and to quote Body Count, "unfortunately... SHIT AIN'T LIKE THAT." The flaw in Communism is that society is made up of human beings, and not flawless robots. Not all human beings want to give up what they've earned, and humans have the tendency to want more than the other guy. In order for Communism to work, you would have to change the very fabric of human nature, and seeing as that's taken a few thousand years to make, it won't be undone anytime soon. And for a less theoretical view of things, look at the countries who have used Communism in the past. Boy, it worked so well! </sarcasm> Communism doesn't work. It's as simple as that. And I'd like to point out that history views Che Guevara mainly as a bumbling idiot who screwed up most of what he tried to do. You might as well put a red and black poster flag of George W. Bush or Eric Bischoff on your wall.

I'll think of more of these eventually..